Saturday 5th June 2021 Devotion
Scripture:- Hebrews 13:1-22
Topic:- Doctor This Is My Fifth Miscarriage In Five Years Of Marriage Who Did I Offend
Text:- Hebrews 13:4
I have the permission of Mrs. Funke to share her painful life journey with you so that you can learn from her bitter experience.
I was inside my consulting room on the fateful day when a young married woman, 25 years old, walked in, looking depressed.
She sighed as she sat. The perplexity on her face said it all. There was a big burden being carried in her heart.
I mustered the courage to ask “how may I help you, madam?”
Then she answered in her frustration. “DOCTOR THIS IS MY FIFTH MISCARRIAGE IN FIVE YEARS OF MARRIAGE; WHO DID I OFFEND?”
Now it was like it was my turn to be frustrated because how could I know the person offended in this issue.
Well, I summoned the courage to overcome the perplexity, I went further to be sure she actually had five miscarriages as she had said.
“Madam Funke, did you actually confirm these five pregnancies with pregnancy tests or scan to start with?”
She answered yes affirmatively with tears in her eyes and her voice shaking vigorously.
“Doctor! I did with both pregnancy test and scan. I confirmed the pregnancy I was sure Doctor.”
“I understand your pains madam,” I responded calming her down.
Then I asked her the next question. “These five miscarriages you have had, can you tell me around what time you usually have them?”
“Around 5 to 6 months Doctor,” she answered with tears rolling down her two cheeks.
“Calm down madam I understand how you feel,” I said, offering her handkerchief to clean her eyes.
With the emotional atmosphere inside my consulting room, I had to pause the consultation to allow her to calm down and express her pains in tears.
“Who would blame a woman who was lucky to get married to a supportive and loving young man at age of 20, all for her to face this kind of hurdle with five miscarriages in five years?”
I said within me. The agony could only be imagined.
After the situation had calmed down, we continued our conversation because we had to get to the root of this matter before we could provide a solution to this perennial calamity that had plagued this new, young family.
From all she had said so far, there was one thing that kept ringing in my mind and that was the issue of blood group incompatibility.
I went ahead to ask her, “What is your blood group?”
“Doctor what does my blood group have to do with this problem?” She answered me looking surprised.
I implored her to answer the question. She said O NEGATIVE.
My husband and I did it before we got married.
My husband is O POSITIVE AND I am O NEGATIVE.
Now the guess on my mind was becoming a reality.
“So madam, have you ever done abortion before, maybe before marriage?”
She looked at me and was silent, put her right hand on her chin, removed it, and retreated into her chair.
She breathed heavily again. After a while she said, in my 200 level, I did abortion 3 times for my boyfriend on Campus.
I was not ready for any pregnancy then but Doctor, does that have something to do with the present miscarriages I am having?
“Well, maybe madam” I answered. “Do you know the blood group of your campus boyfriend?” I asked.
She answered with mixed feelings, “Doctor I don’t know his blood group, we just dated for like two years, she was my only boyfriend before I met my husband.”
“Can you call him madam to ask?” I told her.
She reacted, “Who? My ex? Nooo, Doctor, we no longer talk, he was not happy I left him for my present husband.”
I appealed to her to at least try and make the call. She reluctantly agreed and called him.
After calling 3 times he finally picked the call.
“Yes madam what do we owe this call o?” The voice from the other side resonated angrily.
“Or have you come to break our heart again?”
I could hear because the phone was on the loudspeaker.
She mustered courage and went straight to ask him about the blood group.
The Campus boyfriend was surprised that she didn’t know his blood group in their two years together.
“So Funke, you meant all the times we were together you didn’t know my blood group?
How would you even know when your mind was occupied with another man.
Why are you asking me anyway? What has my blood group got to do with your marriage?” He asked spitefully.
When I saw the bitterness between the two of them was still fresh and this was delaying my diagnosis, I signaled to her to allow me to talk to him.
So I collected the Phone and introduced myself and appealed to him to please tell her the answer.
Then he revealed he was O POSITIVE. Then I sank into my seat.
My diagnosis was almost complete, the only thing left was to do a test to confirm it.
I explained to her that all these revelations from both her past boyfriend and present husband’s blood group and her own blood group might have caused the collision in former pregnancies she aborted and could cause the present repeated miscarriages.
She said in surprise, “I was thinking only Genotype couples have problems within marriage?
” I answered her no. A couple could also have problems with miscarriages if their blood groups were not compatible.
She was really shocked to know this for the first time.
The next question on her mind was, “Does this mean I will not be able to have a child again in my life and i will continue to have miscarriages like this?”
She burst into tears again. I consoled and reassured her that there was still a chance of having her own baby, more efforts would just be needed but the chance of having another miscarriage was still there.
I gave her a test called INDIRECT COOMBS TEST to do to know if a clash had actually occurred in her blood due to past abortions done for the Campus boyfriend but before she agreed she insisted I should explain how this could be.
Then I took time to explain to her thus: “When a woman is O NEGATIVE and her partner is O POSITIVE when the woman gets pregnant the baby will most likely have the blood group of the father which is O POSITIVE.
When a woman with the O NEGATIVE BLOOD carries the baby with O POSITIVE BLOOD, their blood must not touch each other.
If anything like abortion occurs and the O NEGATIVE BLOOD of the mother touches the O POSITIVE BLOOD of the baby, some antibody will develop inside the blood of the mother as a result of this, then next pregnancies of the woman will be attacked by the antibodies and the babies will be killed, leading to more abortions.
This is what I thought has happened to you madam.
She sank into her chair again and sighed for the third time.
She was overwhelmed by all these revelations about BLOOD GROUP ISSUES IN MARRIAGE.
It sounded unbelievable to her that blood groups could give couples this much problem in marriage.
After she had regained herself, she promised to do the test and bring the result later.
Two weeks later, she brought the result, it was POSITIVE, confirming my diagnosis.
I broke the news to her. She wept again but I counseled and consoled her and promised her we would do our best in subsequent pregnancies to see she has her own child.
I told her to come early when she gets pregnant again.
As she was leaving my consulting room that morning, so many lessons engulfed my mind. Below are a few of them:
Lesson Number 1:
I think we health care workers are not educating the public enough on the role of BLOOD GROUP IN MARRIAGE, the benefits, and the risks.
We only focus on Genotype. More people are aware of issues of Genotype more than blood group.
On this, I think we have to start educating the populace more.
Lesson Number 2:
I have said this before and I will say it again. Premarital sex has consequences and complications which can affect the future seriously.
Sex is only meant for married people, delay it till marriage.
Lesson Number 3:
If eventually you get involved in premarital sex and you get pregnant, avoid doing abortion because abortion also has many consequences and complications that can lead to future infertility if you are lucky you do not die in the process of committing the abortion.
Thank you for your time in reading this article. I hope you have learned one or two lessons from it.
Oh Lord God, help and heal my ignorance henceforth by fire, in the name of Jesus Christ.
Have A Beautiful Saturday!